Success With Houseplants

by Notta Comet

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02:35
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04:09
5.
03:06
6.
01:43
7.
8.

credits

released December 5, 2014

Eli Kaufman - Drums
Crawford Smith - Bass, Vocals
Alex Williams - Guitar, Vocals

All songs mixed and recorded by Alex Williams,
with additional recording by Patrick McDowell.
Mastered by Dimitri Condax.
Special thanks to Mike Brody for use of his studio in Jersey.

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license

all rights reserved

about

Notta Comet Montréal, Québec

we play bike rock
we play scientist rock
we play with rocks

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Track Name: Colonial Authorities
The colonial authorities
Had accepted the election of a basket of fruit
To the seat of highest power
"Cause they knew that it would rot with them
And show the tiny seed
Of the burnt out lightbulb
Of the system that they had thought
They worked so hard to build.

You hack, you false god,
Abandoned us here upon this barren clod,
Your moribund church
Left us in the lurch
To fend for
Ourselves.

At the town hall meeting,
The visitors rose and cheered
As they got into the car that had come to pick them up
and they drove beneath the sheet
That sat atop the buildings
All across the country
And was its only map.

Don't
Say
Anything,
You might
Be
Wrong.

You hack, you false god,
Abandoned us here upon this barren clod,
Your moribund church
Left us in the lurch
To fend for
Ourselves.
Track Name: Somebody Oughta Burn Down Ray Kurzweil's House
Varg Vikernes was a terrible man,
But that shouldn't stop him from doin' what he can
To sprout wings and take his place out over the ocean,
Tormenting our sailors by changing their stars and then
Falling victim to technological change beyond his control
Even men like Varg someday grow old.

I wanted to write you a song
About Halifax or Calgary
But I've never been to either one,
But I've got my laptop in front of me
So I called up Google Street View,
Clicked and dragged for a couple of blocks
But there were so many things I couldn't see through
And all the doors were locked
But I gathered enough info,
Made myself a couple of spreadsheets
About some things that you might be into
And all the people I didn't meet.
You have three lines left for a great punchline.

You have one line left for a great punchline.

Feeling unprickly,
For lack of bone sickly,
Who's to blame?
Who's to blame?

Dirty deeds done in my sleep
Oh lord please
Give me a name.
Give me a name.
Track Name: Subways
They said it was a question of
Commuter trust
And that my economic dignity
Was empty vacant lust
I said I didn't mean to do it there,
Said it sorta just slipped out,
But if they paid me a little bit more,
I could give them a normal morning route.
They told me I was senseless
That I didn't know how to bargain
They called it sexual harassment,
I don't need that jargon.

Remember the day
I told you you would be in a world of pain
Are you prepared to grease your axles
With my brain.

So I took my case to the people
And asked them to appraise
What I have that all men have
Without the promise of a raise.
I told them all the arguments,
I showed them all the proof
The scholarly opinion was
That I had been uncouth.

How does it feel to exploit a robot's labor
While you get paid
The city has declared this the place where orange meets blue
Well I have declared it's where I meet you
Track Name: Facism
Please don't mind the blood
I know I look rough
Alas, I was but thirteen
When my body rejected my spleen
And then I expunged my lungs
The neighborhood kids played with them what fun

My skin hangs from my neck
Like a flesh-tone soggy cape
Suffered so long with this pox
Children, at me, threw rocks.
And then, after supping on ipecac
And with one ultimate hack
My entrails were once more contained
No one will torment me again

The man in the apartment had a picture of himself
With the inscription, "Beloved by troubled women,
Cut down by Soviet guns in his prime" and
He looked at it often in the morning
While reflecting on the fact that his life so far had left him
With precious few traditions he could call upon for guidance
In the event of the inevitable cold nights alone in the countryside
That his father, the colonel, had spoken so highly of.
Track Name: Wino Threat
It's not just Czech hops at stake here,
Soon we will run even out of Colt 45.

The better part of the things they saw
That proved they had to move
Were water like their problem was
On december the fourth at noon,
The glaciers roared and melted fast
And flooded the homes of the poor
While the rich packed up and move themselves
To the man-made lakes at Sea World.

It's not just Czech hops at stake here,
Soon we will run even out of Colt 45,
And drinking gasoline will be our only escape.

With the power out and the others dead
They filled their cups with chlorine
And talked about the better times
Falling asleep watching Maury,
They talked about the truth and love
That lay hidden from their lives
Their bank accounts, those dead amounts
Lay dormant by God's design.
Track Name: Flower Song
Oh look, It's noon again
And the picked plaster peelings
From my prone prying
Have finally encased the pillow,
I think I should get up and piss.

I once had a flower
And it was awful nice to look at, yeah
But if anyone had tried to take that flower away from me
Well probly I woulda let them, yeah.

Oh look, it's seven
And the stirrings of sickly straining
From my supine system
have finally subsided,
I think I could stay here forever.

There are some things in life that're just a bit bigger than we are
Like the traffic snarl outside of Exit 8A
Or the reason the tax code never changes the way that you want it to
But what'd you expect would happen.

Anything you want,
You got it. Anything you need,
You got it. Anything at all,
You got it.
Baby.
Track Name: Paradoxical Undressing
Come on mom, you don't have to tuck me into that snowbank
(snowbank)
I'm old enough to handle my own duvet
(duvet)
And you still haven't seen the tattoos that cover my thighs
(thighs)
I don't want to ruin your day
(day)

This is what I fear
That I'll give up the ghost
When civilization's near
Yeah I ate my dogs,
And you would have too
But history won't judge you.

Sometimes, when I was younger
My parents would take me to the Williams-Sonoma in the Freehold Mall
And I would get a cup of hot apple cider and a piece of toffee
And I would point at the sign and I would say we had the same name
And I would try to understand the salad spinners, with all its chrome, and rubberized grips,
and my parents would take me home.

I made this decision by myself, dad.
(dad)
Jackie treats me well he doesn't beat me like the other guys.
(guys)
I make better money than I did at the office
(office)
You don't know me, I do what I want.
(want)

This is what I fear
That I'll give up the ghost
When civilization's near
Yeah I ate my dogs,
And you would have too
But history won't judge you.

Sometimes I catch myself wondering
What happens to the homeless cats in the wintertime,
If the luckier ones sit on their sunbeams and radiators
And judge them for their bad decisions
Or if they want to form a civic council to provide
Insulated cardboard boxes and catnip toy exchange programs
Or if they just howl and howl
howl and howl, howl and howl,
howl and howl, howl and howl,
howl and howl, howl and howl,
howl and howl and howl.
Track Name: Don't Upset My God
Don't upset
Don't upset my god
Get on up
Get on out
Ain't got right
Ain't got right oh lord.
He will come, His will be done.